Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Feedbag


If you've been round to J*O*E*'s newly designed place, you know that he's currently fascinated with Janet Jackson's weight gain and renamed some of Janet's biggest hits.

One of them was "Feedbag" which I was so in love with, I was inspired to rewrite the lyrics. Mean? Maybe, but as a fattie I'm totally within my rights.

"Feedbag"

Light meat, dark meat, gravies and plantain,
I ate them all that's why Dupri out here hatin'
(Cause I'm bofus)

Do I see some cake?
Yeah, that's yummy, yummy, yummy
And is it homemade
Yeah, that's yummy, yummy, yummy
You can cut a slice
Yeah, that's yummy, yummy, yummy
Let me show you how
Yeah, that's yummy, yummy, yummy

So don't skimp on the servings, I'm hungry.
Tonight my body's a big old empty tank and,
Though it's big and fat don't be scared to
feed It I said so
Now let's give some thanks

Feed me like a jaguar blow out my underwire
When you hear my seams rip keep going pile it higher
Fill it up give it to me come on
Fill it up give it to me come on
I need a feedbag, feedbag oh
Feedbag, feedbag oh
Fill it up give it to me come on
Fill it up give it to me come on
I need a feedbag, feedbag oh
Feedbag, feedbag oh

Do I see some pie?
Yeah, that's yummy, yummy, yummy.
Rub it on my thighs.
Yeah, that's yummy, yummy, yummy.
Do you think I'm fat?
Yeah, that's yummy, yummy, yummy.
You gonna eat that?
Yeah, that's yummy, yummy, yummy.

Before we belly up to the table
I need a snack keep it a secret babe
They got pastries and sweets so appealing
Feed my fat face please
Satisfy me babe

Slather it with butter and set the kitchen timer
When you hear the bell ring, you gonna fill my tire.
Fill it up give it to me come on
Fill it up give it to me come on
I need a feedbag, feedbag oh
Feedbag, feedbag oh
Fill it up give it to me come on
Fill it up give it to me come on
I need a feedbag, feedbag oh
Feedbag, feedbag oh

You like it how I work my knife
Got you feeling all sick inside (sick inside)
I gotta body like a hippo's thighs
Make a chef wanna tell lies but I'm so on fire
Never eaten a pelican does it taste like chicken or better than
Cause my gut is serious
Something heavy like gravy, beans and rice.

5 comments:

  1. You are such a genius! Forward it to Weird Al! I think it is a future hit for him.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you, sir. Joe provided the board, I just jumped off of it.

    ReplyDelete
  3. That was insanely hilarious! I had the song playing on iTunes so I could follow it to your lyrics. Nicely done!

    ReplyDelete
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you better make this good.

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